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Psalm 129 A priest was driving along and saw a nun on the side of the road he stopped and offered her a lift which she accepted. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing the habit to open and reveal a leg. The ... 1 2 3 4 5	They Are In The Shower A salesman rang the doorbell and little Johnny answered. The salesman asked if his father was at home. Johnny said, "Yes." The salesman said, "Well, can I see him please?" Johnny snickered ... 1 2 3 4 5
Warming Up An Amish woman and her daughter were riding in an old buggy one cold blustery day. The daughter said to her mother, "My hands are freezing cold." The mother replied, "Put them between your legs. Your ... 1 2 3 4 5	A Dog Named Sex Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him "Rover" or "Spot". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog's license, I told the clerk ... 1 2 3 4 5
Pre-Nuptial Agreements A secretary for a foreign embassy was entertaining a wealthy foreign ambassador during lunch at a very expensive restaurant in uptown New York. The ambassador was so enthralled by the beauty and presence ... 1 2 3 4 5	A Day At The Vet's One day a man took his poodle to the veterinarian. As he walked into the waiting room, he noticed a very attractive young woman with her Great Dane. He sits next to her, trying desperately ... 1 2 3 4 5
According To The Dictionary A Koala bear decides he wants to get laid, so he picks up a hooker. He goes down on her several times and they are really enjoying themselves. After they are finished the koala bear starts getting dressed. ... 1 2 3 4 5	A Big Surprise Harry was delighted when he found a young woman who accepted his proposal of marriage as he was sensitive about his wooden leg and a bit afraid no one would have him. In fact, he couldn`t bring himself ... 1 2 3 4 5
Crushed Nuts? A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, ... 1 2 3 4 5	National Condom Week Did you know that this week is National Condom Week? Here's a salute to the new condoms on the market! Lumberjack Condoms For the woody that won't be cut down. Sprout Condoms Add ... 1 2 3 4 5
Tough Mice Three mice are at a bar, having drinks, talking about how tough they are. The first mouse slams down a shot of booze, says, "Let me tell you how tough I am." I spot a trap and go for the cheese. ... 1 2 3 4 5	At The Sperm Bank A masked man goes into a sperm bank, points a gun at the woman behind the counter, and says, "Open the safe." She says, "This isn't a real bank, it's a sperm bank." He says, "Open the safe ... 1 2 3 4 5
Executive Stress? An executive goes to see his doctor, complaining of feeling worn out all the time due to his long working hours. The doctor asks him a few questions about his lifestyle. Doc: "So, do you and ... 1 2 3 4 5	Hair Spray A little boy and his grandfather are raking leaves in the yard. The little boy finds an earthworm trying to get back into its hole. He says, "Grandpa, I bet I can put that worm back in that hole." The ... 1 2 3 4 5
Hot And Heavy John and his date were parked on a secluded dirt road and started to make out hot and heavy. The chick stopped and said, "I really should have told you this earlier, but I'm actually a hooker and I ... 1 2 3 4 5	Women Vs Condoms What do women and condoms have in common? They spend more time in your wallet then they do on your dick! 1 2 3 4 5
Stuttering Problem A man visits the doctor's because he has a severe stuttering problem. After a thorough examination, the doctor consults with the patient. Doctor: 'It appears that the reason for your stuttering ... 1 2 3 4 5	Wasting Your Time A little boy walks into his parents room and sees his mom bouncing up and down on top of his dad. Mom sees her son and quickly dismounts, worrying about what her son has seen. She dresses quickly ... 1 2 3 4 5
For Better Or Worse A huge man married a petite and innocent girl who was a virgin. He was sexually experienced and suggested having sex "doggie style" on their wedding night. She didn't know what he was talking ... 1 2 3 4 5	Pissing Vodka A Russian strolling down the street in Moscow and kicks a bottle laying in the street. Suddenly out of the bottle comes a Genie. The Russian is stunned and the Genie says, "Hello master, I will grant ... 1 2 3 4 5
Sex Life Of An Electron One night when his charge was pretty high, Micro Farad decided to try to get a cute coil to let him discharge. He picked up Milli Amp and took her for a ride on his megacycle. They rode across Wheastone ... 1 2 3 4 5	Noah's Ark When the Ark's door was closed, Noah called a meeting with all the animals. "Listen up!" Noah said with a demanding voice. "There will be NO SEX on this trip! All of you males take off your penis and ... 1 2 3 4 5
Changes As We Age A young boy asks his father, "Dad, is it ok for us guys to notice all the different kinds of boobs?" Surprised, the father answers, "Well, sure son, we wouldn't be normal if we didn't... there are ... 1 2 3 4 5	Sean And Kylie Sean Connery was interviewed by Michael Parkinson, and bragged that despite his 72 years of age, he could still have sex three times a night. Kylie Minogue, who was also a guest, looked intrigued. After ... 1 2 3 4 5