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No Need to Run The huge Air Canada Jumbo jet is just coming into Pearson Airport (Toronto) on its final approach. The pilot comes on over the intercom. "This is Capt. Johnson, we're on our final descent into Toronto. ... 1 2 3 4 5	Trained Frogs Cindy, a beautiful, well-endowed, young blonde, goes to her local pet store in search of an exotic pet... As she looks about the store, she notices a box full of frogs. The sign says: Snatch Eating ... 1 2 3 4 5
Men Miss All These What do a clitoris, an anniversary, and a toilet have in common? Men always miss them. 1 2 3 4 5	An Opportunist's Tale A man decided to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really good about the result. On his way home he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper. Before leaving he says to ... 1 2 3 4 5
Defending Her Honor One evening a husband comes home to his apartment very roughed up. When his wife sees him she asks, "What happened to you?" "I got into a fight with the apartment manager." "Whatever for?" ... 1 2 3 4 5	Respect In A Marriage A couple has been married for 50 years and are celebrating their anniversary. The wife asks what the husband wants for their anniversary and he replies, "I would like you to perform oral sex on me. ... 1 2 3 4 5
A Poem This is a poem about love... My eyes are gazing out the window, yet my mind is walking with you. We stroll on down the Riverwalk and then have a drink or two. And when the sun is setting, ... 1 2 3 4 5	Love Poem He grabbed me around my slender neck I could not call or scream. He dragged me to my dingy room where we could not be seen. He tore away my flimsy wrap and gazed upon my form. ... 1 2 3 4 5
Scream The Longest Three friends decided to bet each other $100 on who could make their wives scream more from sex. They all go home to have sex with their wives and make them scream. The next day the meet. ... 1 2 3 4 5	Keep Your Legs Together A woman who had outlived eight husbands finally passed away. Old friends and enemies alike gathered at her grave side and consoled or bitched with each other, as is so often the way. ... 1 2 3 4 5
I Wear The Pants A young couple, just married was in their honeymoon suite on their wedding night. As Emma undressed for bed, the husband tossed his pants to his bride and said, "Here put these on." She said ... 1 2 3 4 5	Viagra Side Effects A woman asks her husband if he'd like some breakfast. "Bacon and eggs, perhaps a slice of toast? Maybe a nice sectioned grapefruit, and a cup of fresh coffee?" He declines. "It's this Viagra," ... 1 2 3 4 5
May September Marriage A 90 year old man shows up for a physical. He tells the doctor he is about to marry a 20 year old girl. "Really?" said the doctor. "You're healthy enough, I suppose, but take my advice. If you want ... 1 2 3 4 5	Old Age Brings Specific Problems A ninety-year-old man is sitting on a park bench, sobbing, when a young man walks by and asks him what's wrong. Through his tears the old man answers, "I'm in love with a twenty-five-year-old woman." ... 1 2 3 4 5
Unusual Finger "Class dismissed!" the teacher yelled. Little Johnny doesn't go, he walks to the teachers desk and says, "Teacher can I go home with you?" The teacher says "No!" Little Johnny ... 1 2 3 4 5	Tattoo U-nit A guy goes into a tattoo parlor and asks for a tattoo of a hundred-dollar bill on his penis. Curious, the tattoo artist asks him why he would possibly want that. ''Three reasons. I like to ... 1 2 3 4 5
Ship To Europe A depressed young woman was so desperate that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. When she went down to the docks, a handsome young sailor noticed her tears, took pity on ... 1 2 3 4 5	Organ Rejection A prostitute went to visit a colleague in the hospital just before she was about to have a heart transplant. The woman, concerned about her friend's welfare, went up to the surgeon who was going to ... 1 2 3 4 5
She Says - He Hears What a woman says: This place is a mess! C'mon! You and I need to clean up! Your stuff is lying on the floor and You'll have no clothes to wear if we don't do laundry right ... 1 2 3 4 5	Three Breasts There's this man who's taking a walk around the red light district until he passes a whorehouse with a blinking sign saying: "The Hooker With Three Breasts...". The man get's just a little interested ... 1 2 3 4 5
Different Kinds Of Sex Recent research shows that there are five kinds of sex: - The first kind of sex...SMURF SEX. This kind of sex happens when you first meet someone and you both have sex until you are blue in the ... 1 2 3 4 5	Women Vs Condoms What do women and condoms have in common? They spend more time in your wallet then they do on your dick! 1 2 3 4 5
Trust? A businessman and his secretary, overcome by passion, go to his house for an early afternoon "quickie." "Don't worry," he purrs. "My wife is out of town on a business trip, so there's ... 1 2 3 4 5	Premature Ejaculation A man was having problems with premature ejaculation, so he decided to go to the doctor. He asked the doctor what he could do to cure his problem. In response, the doctor said, "When you feel ... 1 2 3 4 5