One day little Susie went into her back yard and found her dog Muffles lying dead with its legs up in the air.

She asked, "Daddy, Daddy, why are Muffles legs in the air?"

Thinking quickly, her dad replied, "This way Jesus can come down and take Muffles to heaven easier."

The next day when Susie's dad came home, she ran up to him and said, "Daddy, Daddy, Mommy almost died today."

Flustered, her father said, "Honey, what happened?"

"Well, Mommy's legs were up in the air and she was screaming 'Oh Jesus, I'm coming, I'm coming' and if it wasn't for the milkman holding her down she would have been a gonner."